


Gifted Kid Burnout

by blightguts



Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Amity Blight has ADHD, Amity Blight has chronic pain, Autistic Amity Blight, Autistic Luz Noceda, Canes, Catgender Luz Noceda, Chronic Pain, F/F, Gay Disaster Amity Blight, Luz Noceda has ADHD, Neopronouns, No beta readers, Nonbinary Amity Blight, Nonbinary Luz Noceda, Stickers, Stimming, Walking Canes, We Die Like Men, also luz is absolutely a vocaloid kid, luz canonically gecs now and im not sorry, nobody is neurotypical, projection time
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:22:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27205852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blightguts/pseuds/blightguts
Summary: Another shared look of worry and all Amity's panic level could do was go higher. Why did they all look like that? Was it not as common as she thought? What was wrong with what she said?---orGifted Kid burnout sucks when you deny everything about yourself that shouldn't be brushed off
Relationships: Amity Blight/Luz Noceda
Comments: 7
Kudos: 129





	1. Denial

It was a rather nice day on the Boiling Isles, Amity sitting in the grass of the Hexside campus with Luz's friend group. She knew she was a part of it, but it still didn't feel right to ever say she was.

The group chatted away, Willow and Luz enthusiastically discussing new spells the plant witch had learned as the human hyped up her friend. Somehow she managed to loop others in, Gus joining as Luz's verbal inputs went from Point A to Point H. The topic of new plants led to human world knowledge that hadn't been shared yet. Maybe that's why Amity had fallen for her, how the other girl could keep any conversation going in any way.

Amity finally noticed the others were talking to her, dragging her out of her thoughts. 

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

"We wanted to see the new spells Willow learned so we're moving to a better spot!"

Amity felt panicked. Not scared, just… panicked. Her legs had been feeling heavy just sitting down and any nerves in the limbs had almost felt as if they were on fire. It was a pain Amity was used to, she just didn't know how quickly she could follow her friends. 

The group stopped just as fast as they had started when all eyes fell on Amity, struggling more than the others to get to her feet. The bits of conversation paused and worry set in. Willow was the first to speak up.

"Amity, are you okay? Do you need any help?"

"What? No! It's fine! I'm fine! This is normal, just give me an extra second here." Amity almost snapped back.

She was a bit too quick to defend herself, at least sticking to her word as she got to her feet. Her body swayed and her balance was a bit off, but past that she seemed just fine. At least she hoped she did, trying to avoid wincing at the new flare up of pain.

"Okay, where did we want to go again?" Amity said, biting back any vocalization of the pain. The others looked around at each other, trying to decide who should say something first.

"I hate to break it to you, but just by watching you this doesn't seem normal at all." Gus spoke up, noting what the others didn't want to say just yet.

"No, no, it has to be! It's just something everybody deals with sometimes. If we stop focusing on it, we can get there!"

Amity wanted nothing more than to just say something that got the others off her back. It was normal to feel this pain. It was normal for it to be bad enough to almost make her cry. It was normal and for that reason it never deserved to be spoken about. 

Luz decided to be the next to speak up. If anybody could get through to Amity, she already knew it was her.

"Amity, what's wrong? You can tell us, okay?"

The panic from before built up again. Amity looked from person to person before giving a sigh. She knew she could trust them, at least.

"It's just a little bit of pain. It feels bad, and I'm not sure I can stand the pain levels, but it's fine! It's normal, nobody just talks about it! Right…?"

Another shared look of worry and all Amity's panic level could do was go higher. Why did they all look like that? Was it not as common as she thought? What was wrong with what she said? Willow followed up with a small interrogation, hoping to come to a conclusion on the issue the other witch refused to tell about.

"Yeah, that doesn't sound normal… at all. Are you still feeling bad now?"

"I'm fine! It… hurts a bit, but it's nothing I can't handle! It already varies enough."

"Okay… And how often is this pain happening?"

"I'm not really keeping track, but it is pretty often it happens. I can escape it sometimes but seems today isn't like that."

Amity followed it by a light chuckle. She hoped the questions would end soon, that she would be told this is all normal. 

"Amity, that sounds a lot like you're dealing with some chronic pain."

Not like that. She didn't want the questions to end like that.

Amity shut up before she could make any more complaints. That sounded right but… the young witch just wanted to be in denial a bit longer. 

Luz decided to finally break her silence, stepping closer and failing to take notice of how the other girl clammed up.

"I can carry you if it'd help!"

"No!" Amity snapped back. She noticed the look of sudden confusion on Luz's face and tried to save face fast. "No, I'm fine! It shouldn't be that long of a walk, lets just go!"

Amity gave a few nervous laughs before being interrupted by Luz scooping the witch into her arms anyways. Amity felt her face flush, trying to focus on anything other than the everything that was being held by nobody else by Luz.

"Then it shouldn't be too long of a walk for me, let's go!"


	2. Sticker Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amity gets a cane, Luz wants to help personalize it a bit

"Hey Amity!"

Luz waved to Amity from across the room. No matter how many times they shared an Abominations class together, she seemed to still be excited to see the witch. Amity walked towards Luz, staggering a bit as she adjusted to using her cane.

"Oh, you got a cane! That's such a pretty color too!" Luz noted, staring at the new object as Amity sat next to her.

The cane in question was a rather pretty shade of pink. It nearly matched the color of Amity's abomination track uniform, the only difference being the difference of a tint or two between the colors.

"I figured I should finally get one if you guys insist my pain isn't normal at all."

"It isn't! I'm glad you're at least trying to make it easier for yourself to deal with."

Luz paused, looking again at Amity's cane. Something felt off about it, but she couldn't exactly tell what.

"It looks kind of bare though… If you can come by the Owl House after school I think I have some things that could help!"

"I'd love to spend more time with you!" Amity blurted, her pointed ears drooping in embarrassment as her face went red.

"I mean, yes I think I have enough time to go with you."

Luz smiled, seeming to not notice or not care about Amity's initial reaction.

"Sounds like a plan!"

-

Luz had her fingers intertwined with Amity's free hand, the two walking along the smoothest path they could find in the woods. The young witch listened to her girlfriend ramble on about whatever her current hyperfixation was. Amity loved to listen to Luz's infodumps, she got to hear a voice she loved talk with so much energy about things she thought nobody else liked. It was rather difficult having Azura as your biggest special interest when you had nobody else to talk to about it, Amity remembered. She loved giving Luz room to be able to avoid exactly that.

"And we're here!" Luz announced, giving a gentle squeeze to her girlfriend's hand.

The two managed to get inside without a single word from Hooty, Luz leading Amity to her room.

"Make yourself comfortable wherever, I just need to grab something real quick!"

Amity moved to sit down on the floor, closer to the middle of the room. Luz was busy digging through the small yet growing pile of her belongings. A few seconds later, the sounds of digging got slower before stopping entirely.

"Found it!" Luz announced, turning around and walking to sit next to Amity.

Luz was holding a plain light brown messenger bag. The bag had a few pins on it, though Amity only recognized a small collection of them. Those few she knew were of a bisexual and nonbinary flag next to each other, paired with their close friend of a rainbow infinity pin. She could never remember the Minecraft creeper pin or the Zelda style heart container even if she put all her energy towards it.

Luz opened the bag, quickly dumping the contents on the floor between the two.

"Your cane looked really empty, so I figured we could spice it up with some stickers!"

Amity smiled softly, looking down at the pile of stickers. There were quite a few to choose from, ranging from pride flags to Among Us style crewmates. Amity tapped one hand on the ground in excitement, worrying that any bigger excited stims would lead to yet another session of the two girls happy stimming together. It was nice when it accidentally happened, but Amity wanted to focus on what Luz had just layed out instead.

"Feel free to take your time, okay? We've got all the time in the world!" Luz said, rubbing a thumb along Amity's hand.

-

Amity watched as her girlfriend put the last sticker on right where she had pointed for its placement.

"There we go! That should be it for now!"

Luz smiled, looking at the selection so far.

The once bare pink cane now had many stickers along it, lesbian and nonbinary flags overlapping with a smiley face underneath and a lineup of purple hearts along the metal before the handgrip. A lime green crewmate sat between the flags and the hearts. It wasn't much but it was a start.

Amity found a bit of courage, leaning over to kiss her girlfriend's cheek. Luz blushed, raising a hand to press to her cheek afterward.

"Thank you, Luz."

"Anything for you, Ams.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually drew something for this before, at least I finally wrote the fic it was for!  
> https://toebeanking.tumblr.com/post/631375007554125824/dont-mind-me-just-making-art-for-a-fic-i-still  
> -  
> tbh Hooty just doesn't talk because I just could *not* be bothered to write him right now


	3. Vocaloids, Neopronouns, and Fluff - Oh My!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lumity fic writers be like "I know a place" and then take you to Amity's library hideout  
> I'm not immune to that

"I now declare the first meeting of the Azura Book Club started!"

Luz laughed at the serious tone she held a second ago, easing to sit down in a bean bag chair. The two decided Amity's hideout in the library was the best place to go, only a select few people knew of the room so nobody could interrupt them.

Amity followed suit, leaning her cane against the desk near her chair. The two looked at each other for a moment before breaking the eye contact rather quickly. 

"So, shall we get started?" Amity asked, giving a side glance back towards Luz.

There was a sound of a bag opening and being dug through before a moment of silence.

"Is… now a bad time to mention I forgot my book?" Luz chuckled, "I always have it on me until I need it, huh?"

Amity couldn't help but laugh along. 

“We could always talk about other things while we’re here. I don’t think it would be kind on my body to get back up now.” Amity explained, looking over at her cane as she talked. She still didn’t understand exactly how her pain even worked, but she knew at least from horrible experiences that getting up and down constantly caused the worst flare-ups.

“Yeah! About that, I’ve been meaning to ask something.”

“Okay, shoot.”

“Why did you ignore your pain for so long?”

Amity froze for a second. Not in fear, not in any negative emotion, just giving herself a second to actually think about it. She laughed for a second to brush it off, giving a response that most likely wasn’t what Luz wanted.

“You’re starting rather deep here on the questions.”

“Sorry!”

“No no! It’s okay, I just…”

She never thought of a clear answer to it, but she figured she could try.

“I always figured it was something everybody went through that was meant to be suppressed. I thought it was like my stimming or my overload, something everybody dealt with but kept quiet on. I figured if I stayed quiet too, it might go away and I’d be perfect.”

Perfect. Just like her parents wanted. Just like her teachers wanted. That was all Amity could be.

“Oh no, you were treated like a gifted kid. That just leads to all kinds of burnout later! No wonder you were so scared when we tried to help you. I’m so sorry, Ami, but it’s okay to not be perfect. Okay?”

Amity gave Luz a soft smile, reaching out to hold her girlfriend’s hand.

“You’ve already taught me that.”

Luz smiled back, rubbing Amity’s hand with her thumb.

The human started to look around the room, trying to find anything to talk about next. Her eyes landed on the Azura collection on the shelf behind Amity, mixing with a song stuck in her head to lead to a new topic.

“So you guys also have Azura books, I wonder if you have anything else from my world too.”

“Oh? Anything specific you’re curious about?”

“Really I’m just curious if you guys have Vocaloids too…!” Luz mumbled, looking away out of embarrassment. She never thought that hyperfixation was bad, she just knew from the kids at her school in the human realm others would usually judge after hearing the simple name of the engine.

Despite her conditioned better judgment, Luz winced as she focused on Amity's face. The witchling didn't look disgusted like she had expected from the years before. Instead, she looked as if she wanted to hear more already.

"What's a Vocaloid?" Amity asked. The excited taps of Luz's fingers against her own knees as she got excited to infodump did not go unnoticed.

"Well, they're voice engines produced by a company named Crypton! Anybody that buys the program can make songs using the voicebanks they get too! Hatsune Miku is really popular, but I like Rin and Len more. And Gumi's nice too!" Luz started rambling, trying to recall as much information as she could off the top of her head. She didn't mind if she got a fact wrong, it's not like she could be called out on it.

"I like all of the concerts put on too! They use holograms of the characters on stage and the tech behind that itself is so cool too! Crypton does well with their shows, but I really like the NicoNico Cho Parties because they include more characters and it's all just like a big remix!" Luz continued on, her sentences running on as she kept thinking of new things to mention.

"I like a few producers, but I just like individual songs more! I do like GHOST and Neru the most out of the producers I listen to!" Luz smiled, not noticing that she had started flapping her hands as she kept explaining.

Amity nodded her head, clearing her throat to speak after realizing Luz had finished.

"So it's music?"

"Yeah! I have a few songs saved on my phone," Luz exclaimed, pulling out the device. "Here, let me show you!"

She always knew saving YouTube videos would end up being worth it. It was originally ready for any time Luz had no signal or wifi connections, but for now, it worked even more in her favor. The young witch looked over the human's shoulder, glancing at her girlfriend's face beforehand to make sure the action was okay.

A few titles caught Amity's attention as Luz tried to find what she had mentioned before.

_100 gecs - money machine (Official Music Video), 100 gecs - Stupid Horse | Exclusive Live Performance for 12 Moods: ENERGIZED | Skullcandy, 100 gecs - 800db cloud (Official Music Video), 100 gecs - hand crushed by a mallet (MUSIC VIDEO)_

"What's a 'gec'?"

"Nothing!"

Luz scrolled a bit longer before finding one titled _【OFFICIAL】 NicoNico Cho Party 2015 VOCALOID Live_

"This one's my favorite!" the human explained, holding her phone for both to see the screen before pressing play.

Amity watched with interest, trying to keep her own happy stims to a minimum as she observed each new part of the show. This was new to her, but knowing how happy it made Luz along with being amazed by the display just made her excited.

As the video ended, Luz pressed a button on the side of the device to black out the screen. Amity looked at her girlfriend, waiting for any new topics to discuss. Luz looked around the room again, trying to jog any thoughts again. She looked over at Amity's cane, her mind racing with new thoughts as she looked at the stickers along it. The lesbian and nonbinary flags wrapped around the cane stuck out to her.

"So we've discussed sexualities and gender before," Luz started. "But what about microlabels? Are those uncommon or just non-existent here?"

Amity tilted her head, the human smiling back as she got ready to explain another new thing.

"So you know how non-binary is an umbrella term for anything that isn't binary male or female?"

Amity nodded.

"Well, microlabels are terms coined by others to describe somebody's relationship with their gender! Anybody can use them, but they are rather common in non-binary circles from my experiences!" Amity looked a bit lost in thought, snapping herself out fast to gesture for Luz to keep going.

"For example, I use the labels catgender and witchgender for myself! I also coined Azuragender for myself. The only issue is I still don't know how to design a flag for that one," Luz started, ready to keep explaining. "For me, I identify as catgender because I identify with cats so much that it gets involved with my perception of my gender. I coined Azuragender to just mean any ties to The Good Witch Azura series and Azura herself making an impact on somebody's gender!"

Amity chuckled a bit at that. She didn't find it silly at all, she just found it to be the best response from her. She didn't like to talk much as Luz explained things, the witchling just liked to focus on everything her girlfriend said and see how excited it made her.

“Oh! And there are things called neopronouns too! They’re just pronouns that are outside of the basic he/him, she/her, and they/them!” Luz explained. Amity would say there was an excited sparkle in her eyes with every word she spoke.

“And since I’m catgender, I like to use a few that I associate with it! They make me kinda euphoric, but I’m a bit too nervous to ask anybody to use ‘em for me.” Luz continued, bringing up a hand to awkwardly scratch at the back of her head.

“I could use them for you,” Amity blurted out, reaching out to hold Luz’s free hand. “Tell me what they are and I’ll do my best.”

Luz smiled, still rather nervous as she grabbed a notepad and pencil from her bag. It was originally put there to quickly draw glyphs when needed, but it wouldn’t hurt to use it now for a quick lesson in neopronouns.

The witchling watched as the human set down the notepad on an empty page, observing as she wrote down columns titled ‘she’,’her’,’hers’, and ’herself’.

“Okay, these are pronouns you should be familiar with. I’ll teach you the different forms of my sets using this!” Luz explained, starting to write under each column.

Amity watched each new mark of the pencil as it was filled out in the order of ‘nya’, ’nya’, ’nyas’, and ‘nyaself’. Luz opened her mouth to speak again before pausing, adding a new set underneath. This one filled out the page with ‘purr’, ‘purr’, ‘purrs’, and ‘purrself’

“Those are my other sets!”

Luz smiled, tearing the page out from the notepad and handing it to Amity. The witchling looked over the page, returning the smile for a second before confusion washed over.

“Can you give me some examples of how they’re used?”

“Yeah! I can write them out! Just let me…”

Luz stopped herself, pausing to process before grabbing her phone and tapping at the screen.

“I can just show you my pronouny!” Luz exclaimed, handing the device to Amity.

The page was a simple white, the boxes underneath the highlighted ‘pronouns’ tab written in blue text. The witchling noticed the account name ‘luzura’ near the top of the page. It definitely was Luz’s account then. Luz reached over to tap a box reading ‘nya/nya/nyas/nyas/nyaself’.

“My account lets me put in all my pronoun sets and offers examples of how to use them in sentences!”

Amity silently read over the examples, reading and rereading until she was sure she understood.

“Well, I’m glad nya let me know how to use nyas pronouns. I love purr very much.” the witchling said, avoiding eye contact as she felt a blush creeping onto her face at the last sentence she spoke.

Luz just smiled back, pulling Amity into a rather tight hug. Neither one of them minded, it was a nice show of affection for Luz and it was one of the few touches Amity liked. The witchling flapped one of her hands as they both sat in the embrace, she couldn’t help that these kinds of hugs were a wonderful pressure stim for her.

Luz gave Amity a quick peck on the cheek before pulling away, moving to rest her hands on her girlfriend’s.

“So, meeting adjourned?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can tear nya/nyaself and purr/purrself catgender Luz from my cold, dead hands  
> Did I actually make Luz's Pronouny to fit my version of nya? Yes  
> https://pronouny.xyz/u/luzura  
> Am I gonna possibly end up making an Amity one to fit more of my headcanons for a later chapter? Perhaps :3c


End file.
